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E-Mu

Expert

Didn't I see you get your ass kicked on COPS?
I pay your salary!
Gee, Officer...that's terrific...the last officer only gave me a warning too!
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around-that's how far ahead of me they are.
What do you mean, "Have I been drinking?" You're the trained specialist.
No, YOU assume the position.
I'm surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1 special!
If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?
No, offi, offic, lucifer . . . I'm not as think you are drunk I am. I swear to dog.
No, I don't know how fast I was going. The little needle stops at 110 mph.
Back off, Barney, I've got a piece.
Want to race to the station, Sparky?
I know I was weaving, but I was trying to hit all the little green men!
On the way to the station let's get a six pack.
You'll never get those cuffs on me. . . You Homo!
Come on write the damn ticket, the bars close in 20 minutes!
Hey, wasn't your daughter a porn queen?
How long is this going to take? Your wife is expecting me.
Hey officer is that your nightstick, or are you just glad to see me?
What do you use those rubber gloves for, anyway?
I know I was weaving, but I can't find the Honeycomb Hideout!

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1 More "what not to say to a cop who pulls you over" on Tue Jan 19, 2010 11:11 am